Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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