Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize