Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
is that a dick in a sweater?
You ate ashes out of my bong
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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