Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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