Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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