At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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