Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize