Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
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My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I would fuck him just for his dog
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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