I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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