I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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