She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
So many bounce houses so little time
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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