She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize