A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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