when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize