Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize