Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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