We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
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Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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