apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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