did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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