Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
The uberlube is also flammable
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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