i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize