I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Acid is not a monday night drug
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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