I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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