i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize