I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize