You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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