Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize