Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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