I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
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