even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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