I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I think a kid would responsible me up
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize