im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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