Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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