You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I love you. Go after that dick
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize