Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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