If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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