Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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