Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize