You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize