dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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