Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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