See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize