She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize