end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
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you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
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