i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize