My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize