just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
just tell him i said nine months
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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