we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
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I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize