the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
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He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
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I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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