i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
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Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
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I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
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